Hello again....two days in a row.......could this be a habit??
I have a question for you, my few but mighty............am I the only one who gets sick and tired of people pointing out the obvious, when you are at a bad spot in life??
For instance, my sister stated this: "if you are not where you want to be, then you must not want to be there very badly. Happiness is all in the perspective"
As if wanting something was all it took to have it.
Another example: "you have two wonderful kids" ok, yes I do have two wonderful kids, but is that my sole reason for existence....to have these kids?? So if thats the case, then I guess I could go ahead and die, cause they are pretty much done with my knowledge, and I am basically just an ATM.....
"You have your health" Um.no, actually I do not have my health...at least not at this moment, so again I ask you ...should I just die now??? "you are not homeless" again, Im supposed to just be satisfied, because I am not on the streets??
"at least you have a job" so then that would apply to someone who cleans sewers?? We are supposed to just go through life being satisfied with what we have right now??? And if we arent, then we just dont want anything better badly enough??
I want things, but there are obstacles that make it damn near impossible to get them, so who the hell are these family members, friends etc. to sit there and basically tell me to just shut up and eat the shit on the plate that Ive been served?????
Thursday, March 17, 2011
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
Oh dont worry folks, Im still here.
I have kinda fallen off the blogging wagon. Partly because I have felt very uninspired as of late, and partly because I hibernate during the winter.
But alas, the time has changed, the sun is shining, and I am back.
Ok, Ok, if you know me at all, then you know the only reason I am back is because I have some crap to speak, and people, Ive got diarrhea of the mouth!!
Remember how I moved here, because I thought that someone had invaded "my world:, and I was afraid to speak my mind??
Well let me tell you. That hefer did not read my blog. (She is just a whining, crying baby!!) I would have bet my life that she had, but recent happenings, have completely changed my mind about that, and let me tell you that I am utterly and completely disappointed in myself for just dumping off my world because I was worried about someones feelings.
Things in my world have been topsy turvy lately. FYI, I am seriously considering moving back to "my world", cause as odd as it seems, I cannot seem to feel "at home" here in my new digs...so I will let you know.
The squatter, we will call her, cause I cannot even for the life of me remember what I had called her before....deadbeat?? bankrupt? oh yeah, thats right SERIAL ASS KISSER!!!
Well, its a long story, so people, pull up a chair, a strong cup of coffee......vodka........wine.....whatever your drink of choice may be.
She friggin "dumped" me via facebook!! We were facebook friends....(if you remember I was upset that I thought I had hurt her feelings, and I kinda liked her.) Anyways, she posted this big ole dramatic statement, about how there comes a time in your life when you have to let go of the people who hurt you and cause you pain and drama,. blah blah blah...... I hadnt seen the post, but I did see that she was crying and upset....yet again....(and I KNEW it wasnt me, cause one, I had left "my world" and two, I hadnt blogged at all) so dumbass me sends her an email asking if she was ok,. and I get this big ole email basically breaking up with me. I apparently hurt her feelings on a daily basis, and I break her heart every single day.. She never knows whether or not Im really her friend........ok here is the thing.......
NO ONE EVER WONDERS WHERE THEY STAND WITH ME....NEVER.
I may say things that hurt you, or piss you off, but you never have to wonder about how I feel about you. So I asked, cause I was honestly confused about what I said that broke her heart, and at that moment, I cared. She never told me what I supposedly said. Fast forward five minutes, and I saw the complete and total absurdity of it all.....my thought was this....."bitch you are 40+ years old, and you are acting like an insecure 12 year old." So, I basically told her that if she had any self respect she would have called me out on whatever offense I had committed and we could have moved on, but since she felt the need to act like a child, broadcast all over facebook the drama that I supposedly cause, and still not have the balls to tell me what I had said that was so terrible, she could kiss my ass. I also pointed out that since we work together, I would be polite and professional, however, I had no desire to tiptoe around her and her very fragile emotions.
I unfriended her, and felt 20 pounds lighter for having been done with the whole thing.
She decided the next day.....via facebook again.....that she loves me unconditionally and accepts me for who I am........so sad for her, I didnt see her post.....Mama H did, and filled me in on it....but Im done with that........I was a hypocrite the entire time I was "friends" with her anyways. I was always thinking to myself how "ass kissing" she was, how unhealthy her eating habits were, how much of a pigsty her house was, how she files bankruptcy, and then goes to The Bahamas....Vegas........... Jamaica.....and today I heard she will be taking vacation in Hawaii.......
I am so disgusted that my stomach is literally churning. I am struggling with my bills, but I pay them. I am having some serious medical bills, but I pay them..... It just pisses me off more than you could imagine, that she will "lament" over having to declare bankruptcy, then tell everyone here all about her adventures while out globetrotting.
I am trying to be a better, happier person. It was something I was really working on, cause I figured that all my anger and judgement of others was bringing me down, and making me into someone I didnt want to be.... I tried to tell myself, that my day will come....... One day I will get out of my HOVEL....... One day I will be a home owner or even renter (because I dream that big)......one day I may own a brand new car....and when those dont appease me, I try to tell myself how blessed I am with happy healthy children....with a roof over my head....with food in my mouth.....then I come to work and hear this bitch brag all about their trips to the nail salon, private lessons...........blah blah blah.....I guess I am one of those people who is just never satisfied!!!
Ok, I feel somewhat better now, having thrown that out there.
Thanks blogging friends for missing me. I will try to be back more regularly, after all, I havent even mentioned my mother in law and the move to Florida........stay tuned.
But alas, the time has changed, the sun is shining, and I am back.
Ok, Ok, if you know me at all, then you know the only reason I am back is because I have some crap to speak, and people, Ive got diarrhea of the mouth!!
Remember how I moved here, because I thought that someone had invaded "my world:, and I was afraid to speak my mind??
Well let me tell you. That hefer did not read my blog. (She is just a whining, crying baby!!) I would have bet my life that she had, but recent happenings, have completely changed my mind about that, and let me tell you that I am utterly and completely disappointed in myself for just dumping off my world because I was worried about someones feelings.
Things in my world have been topsy turvy lately. FYI, I am seriously considering moving back to "my world", cause as odd as it seems, I cannot seem to feel "at home" here in my new digs...so I will let you know.
The squatter, we will call her, cause I cannot even for the life of me remember what I had called her before....deadbeat?? bankrupt? oh yeah, thats right SERIAL ASS KISSER!!!
Well, its a long story, so people, pull up a chair, a strong cup of coffee......vodka........wine.....whatever your drink of choice may be.
She friggin "dumped" me via facebook!! We were facebook friends....(if you remember I was upset that I thought I had hurt her feelings, and I kinda liked her.) Anyways, she posted this big ole dramatic statement, about how there comes a time in your life when you have to let go of the people who hurt you and cause you pain and drama,. blah blah blah...... I hadnt seen the post, but I did see that she was crying and upset....yet again....(and I KNEW it wasnt me, cause one, I had left "my world" and two, I hadnt blogged at all) so dumbass me sends her an email asking if she was ok,. and I get this big ole email basically breaking up with me. I apparently hurt her feelings on a daily basis, and I break her heart every single day.. She never knows whether or not Im really her friend........ok here is the thing.......
NO ONE EVER WONDERS WHERE THEY STAND WITH ME....NEVER.
I may say things that hurt you, or piss you off, but you never have to wonder about how I feel about you. So I asked, cause I was honestly confused about what I said that broke her heart, and at that moment, I cared. She never told me what I supposedly said. Fast forward five minutes, and I saw the complete and total absurdity of it all.....my thought was this....."bitch you are 40+ years old, and you are acting like an insecure 12 year old." So, I basically told her that if she had any self respect she would have called me out on whatever offense I had committed and we could have moved on, but since she felt the need to act like a child, broadcast all over facebook the drama that I supposedly cause, and still not have the balls to tell me what I had said that was so terrible, she could kiss my ass. I also pointed out that since we work together, I would be polite and professional, however, I had no desire to tiptoe around her and her very fragile emotions.
I unfriended her, and felt 20 pounds lighter for having been done with the whole thing.
She decided the next day.....via facebook again.....that she loves me unconditionally and accepts me for who I am........so sad for her, I didnt see her post.....Mama H did, and filled me in on it....but Im done with that........I was a hypocrite the entire time I was "friends" with her anyways. I was always thinking to myself how "ass kissing" she was, how unhealthy her eating habits were, how much of a pigsty her house was, how she files bankruptcy, and then goes to The Bahamas....Vegas........... Jamaica.....and today I heard she will be taking vacation in Hawaii.......
I am so disgusted that my stomach is literally churning. I am struggling with my bills, but I pay them. I am having some serious medical bills, but I pay them..... It just pisses me off more than you could imagine, that she will "lament" over having to declare bankruptcy, then tell everyone here all about her adventures while out globetrotting.
I am trying to be a better, happier person. It was something I was really working on, cause I figured that all my anger and judgement of others was bringing me down, and making me into someone I didnt want to be.... I tried to tell myself, that my day will come....... One day I will get out of my HOVEL....... One day I will be a home owner or even renter (because I dream that big)......one day I may own a brand new car....and when those dont appease me, I try to tell myself how blessed I am with happy healthy children....with a roof over my head....with food in my mouth.....then I come to work and hear this bitch brag all about their trips to the nail salon, private lessons...........blah blah blah.....I guess I am one of those people who is just never satisfied!!!
Ok, I feel somewhat better now, having thrown that out there.
Thanks blogging friends for missing me. I will try to be back more regularly, after all, I havent even mentioned my mother in law and the move to Florida........stay tuned.
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